Let’s understand the game… Leliana Pârvulescu, Psychologist
My trip into the gambling world is taking new steps. I am glad to have you as my companions in my attempt to understand what happens on the backstage, behind the lights and the magical atmosphere that I find there every time I go there to notice, to figure out, to feel the events.
I just like sitting down somewhere, among the machines and let myself being absorbed into the atmosphere, while trying to define what ludopathy is. This is my topic for today and it is related to what can happen in a gaming room. It sometimes seems independent of our will and it deems fit to be ready for a possible slip into this habit.
Ludopathy is the inability to resist to the urge of playing on a slot machine or roulette, to make bets – exaggeratedly – that can affect the activity of the person joining this category. Whoever reaches that stage cannot do anything but play and striving to prolong this experience as much as possible.
My suggestion is to talk about the gambling addict or the pathological gambler. He is the one who plays, whether loses or wins. For him, the only thing that matters is to play…until he is left with nothing.
What I have in mind is to share the signs that these people display, so that you, the people next to them, can identify and make them aware of what they are going through, to accept that sometimes people need to ask for help.
What is in the mind of such player? An intense desire to go through the same feelings he has in the gaming room, while giving himself reasons to play, to win back what he had lost in that special world.
One of the first warning signals is to have him lose interest in the friends who do not share the same passion for gambling and for his daily activities. He will gradually lose his ability of self-limitation in terms of the time allotted to gambling.
At the same time, the player will keep telling himself that ‘he only plays to win the money he had lost’, ‘because he needs money for the family’, ‘to take his friends out for a beer’, etc.
Besides these thoughts, the pathological player also shows an alteration of time perception, cannot realize how time flies. He will glue himself to the slot machine or to the gambling table. He won’t even go to eat or drink, he stays there like in a trance. He is afraid to leave the place, so he will not miss the big moment of winning.
When he loses, the pathological player will not stop, he will go on playing thinking and being sure that it will not take long until he wins, turns to various rituals that enforce his conviction.
The probability of having a gambling addict in a gambling or betting room is quite slim.
A totally different story with the online gambling. Unfortunately, the undisciplined presence of the online betting should raise a red flag, as ludopathy is very likely to emerge. It is quite easy for a minor child to access gambling applications from their computer or cellular. This is called m-gambling, and its name comes from ‘mobile’, a true magnet for teens and underage children.
The minors are defined by a fragile perception of reality and they can be easily influenced by the magic thinking; everything is possible for them, they can become rich and influential, easily and overnight.
Not the same thing happens in the legally organized gambling rooms, where minors are not allowed to enter, where players can access certain special programs, such as ‘Responsible Gaming’, supported by Romanian Bookmakers – the association that represent the organizers of sport betting in Romania and Romslot – the organizers of the slot machine rooms.
The help that this program provides consists in psychotherapy, more specifically the cognitive-behavioral one. The group therapy is also successful in dealing with ludopathy, and the 12-step method is one of the most common.
While in psychotherapy, there are three important stages I would like to point out at: first – when the player becomes aware of his situation, second – when he admits his problem, thoughts, behavior leading to the compulsive game and third – when the change of the negative mental information occurs and the positive ones take their place.
For the second stage, I would make further comments. A behavior that identifies with the pathological game is triggered by an old or new adjacent problem, which exists in the mind or life of that person. It could be a life disillusion, loss of loved ones, professional dissatisfaction, etc.
Should the problem stays there, there occurs the desire to avoid it, which is going towards alcohol, drugs, gambling or betting.
There might be a variety of reasons, specific to their personality of each individual.
A study conducted by Harvard University shows that, in many cases, the pathological gamblers display variations of the system that regulates the dopamine, a substance involved in conveying pleasure.
The study also includes elements that prove the fact that these players have a deficiency of the inhibition ability, of memory archiving, as well as a minor activation of certain brain areas that coordinates the emotions.
People looking for strong emotions, associated with a high degree of excitation or those who find it difficult to express their emotions and feelings are attracted to gambling. The introvert people, with a low self-esteem are more prone, according to the study, to fulfilling their need by gambling.
An important role for overcoming a pathological behavior is played by the close circle of the people suffering from ludopathy – family, friends. They need to have clues so that they will identify the state and act on it. This is one of the elements provided by the Responsible Gaming program, mentioned above.
What to do and how to act – the wife, husband or the friend of a pathological gambler.
In other words, you could have a husband or a friend you are concerned about because you see him or hear that he has a behavior falling into gambling-related pathological issues, repeatedly. And you do not know whether to place in there, while reading these lines. Now, this is your chance to understand whether your husband or friend needs help.
I will enumerate a few tips, from the perspective of the program coordinator.
WHAT TO DO:
It is helpful to talk to the player, thus giving him all the information about the pathological game and expressing your concern. Make him accept professional help.
Do it in such a way that the entire family becomes aware that ludopathy is pathological and it can be treated.
Organize the time so that the pathological gamble will be busy with constructive activities.
Check the situations where the player is asking for money loans and try to curb his need for borrowing.
Help him to cut off friendship with compulsive players.
Look for a specialist, a program that gives you solutions for the above.
WHAT NOT TO DO:
Do not think that this is something easy; the player cannot find the way out from ludopathy by himself; the strong desire of the player or his family is not enough. You will always need external help.
Do not underestimate the issue, thinking it is only a temporary state.
Do not give money to the player.
Do not stress more on the negative episodes or relapses if the player is making efforts to change his behavior.
The help of the family and close relatives is priceless. The fact that the player does not feel alone, that he has people around him he can talk to, is essential in supporting a therapy program and helps with its completion.
Until next time, when I bring more stories from the gambling room, live free!
